I consider myself to be a recovering Negaholic. And as I look back on my life, I am saddened by the time and energy I wasted being filled with negativity. It greatly upsets me to see the relationships I ruined and the bridges I have burned, and to see the truth that all along, I was my own worst enemy.
As I have pulled myself slowly from the grips of negativity, the perspective I now have gives me personal insight into this very powerful group of emotions.
When I think of negativity and all that falls under its umbrella, (hate, jealousy, grief, tension, regret, fear, embarrassment, etc.) I can now see that these are strictly earthly elements. These negative emotions are like low-lying fog. Also, I now realize that negativity is actually pretty selfish, and self-serving (or so we think). Negativity is purely ego-driven, and when we operate out of negativity constantly, we really cannot get over ourselves, outside of our own misery. It is like having blinders on to the rest of humanity. It's a very "you vs. me" mentality, instead of "us". Because truly, at the end of the day, we are in this thing called life together; we are all connected.
Think about it: when you are angry or negative, it can completely consume you. You can't think about hardly anything else. And in my experience, the more angry I was about something, the more it took over my mind. The hardest part is that when we are stuck in our fog, it can be impossible to see anything and believe anything but the fog. Then we start to believe that the world is just completely foggy. Which rationally, we know isn't true. The clouds can cover the sun and blue sky, but it is always there.
Conversely, positive energy vibrates at a higher level. If we consistently choose to operate at a higher level, in which our intentions come from a place of love, joy, peace, hope, understanding, and compassion, the possibilities are endless. We have the power to inspire, to heal, to teach, to guide, and to uplift each other. Yes, here on earth, negativity has a strong pull, like gravity, but it can be overcome ultimately by positivity. Truly positive emotions are the essence of spiritual love, no matter what your beliefs, no matter who your God is.
The good news is that we have the power to lift our own fog. Fog can feel safe to us, especially when that's all we know. It is protection. If we don't let anyone into our world and hurt anyone that comes near, it does keep up protected (and lonely). Unfortunately, it isn't that easy, and as I know from personal experience, negativity doesn't get us anywhere. I have also learned that it is impossible for me to hold both negativity and positivity in my heart at the same time. And I cannot fulfill my life's purpose filled with bad thoughts and a grim mindset.
Being negative is a personal choice. How do I change this behavior, you ask? I recommend baby steps towards positivity. You will not be perfect 100% of the time, and no one else is either. Focus on your wonderful gifts that make you unique. Make a point to practice gratitude daily, especially in the little things. If you catch yourself engaging in negative self-talk (i.e.. I'm too fat, I am not good enough, nobody loves me), divert your attention to something positive, like a good book or good company. And do not talk bad about others. Ever. And most importantly, WHEN you do get off track, don't berate yourself and throw in the towel because you believe you cannot do it. Let it go, and do better the next time, in the next situation.
I now choose to live positively. No I am absolutely not perfect 100% of the time. But I feel better and believe that I am being the change I wish to see in the world. I am more aware of my impact on my environment and have developed a social conscience. I am also more aware of my abundant blessings. When I take the time to look around me, I am astounded by the love and support that I wasn't aware I had, and I am so grateful that I am not wasting any more of my time and energy on negativity.
K
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